The Pacifier
by Hankashi
Summary: Loki has turned Steve Rogers into a baby, for his own entertainment. Now Tony has to take care of a one-year-old Captain America. What could possibly go wrong? A fluffy story. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1: Chubby and curled up

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Marvel.**

* * *

10880 Malibu Point, 90265.

It's 7:52 am, Tony realizes by gazing rapidly at the clock on his desk. He walks out of his laboratory and goes upstairs to get fuel for his system. He didn't sleep at all last night no matter how much Steve begged or extortion him last night; Tony insisted on finishing one of his complicated and almost useless projects.

The genius goes upstairs and directly to the kitchen but finds Pepper sitting on the living room, arraigning a bunch of a few million important papers with thrilling facility.

"Pepper... What the hell?" Tony questions himself and walks toward her.

"Oh hi, Tony. Finally decided to leave your workplace?" She wouldn't unhook her eyes from the paperwork.

"Didn't know you were here. JARVIS?" Tony looked up at the ceiling like if he would find the AI right there.

"_I, in fact, notified you of Ms. Potts' presence, sir_." The voice in the walls answered politely.

"Yeah, sure you did. What's the matter, Pep?"

"It's kind of obvious, isn't it?" The redhead replied with a soft smile.

"What's with all your sass?" Tony massaged his temples vehemently. "Okay, bring it."

"Give me a second. If I order these right now I can leave sooner."

"Seriously, now. What's wrong with you?" The CEO made his own kind of a bitch face at Pepper, even when she wasn't looking, she would notice by his distinctive tone.

"I have a meeting. I can't dare to be late." Pepper took a deep breath as she kept working _warp speed_.

"Aha. I'll be right back, then." Tony trotted lightly and enthusiastic to the stairs.

"Where are you going?!"

"I'll good morning Steve and I'll be right back, don't worry!" Tony shouted on his way upstairs.

It was probably 8 am already; Steve should be getting out of the shower by now. Tony imagined seeing his boyfriend half dressed (or luckily, naked), wet, blond hair, well-formed muscles everywhere on his body, a sweet smell of shampoo and lotion striking directly at his senses, a good morning kiss… But instead he got _that_.

A baby. Chubby and curled up on the unmade bed, nice and somewhat abundant blond hair, sucking continually on his thumb.

Tony felt his body temperature decrease instantly from head to toe as his eyes widen as much as possible, stepping back and now fully aware of all his senses.

"PEPPEEEEER!"

* * *

**A/N: I hope you liked it! This is just getting started. **

**The next episodes will be longer, _hopefully._**

**Please leave your reviews :) **


	2. Chapter 2: Loki, you little sht

**Disclaimer: All characters belong to Marvel. **

**Enjoy! **

* * *

The redhead ran upstairs as soon as she heard the gut-wrenching scream from the CEO. She was next to Tony in a legendary record.

"What is it, Tony?!" Pepper screamed two or three octaves higher than her normal tone and all out of air.

"Th- That!" Tony pointed at the harmless baby, who had just been awaked by the frightening and not manly at all screams, and of course was now crying his lungs out.

"What the hell?! Who is that?!"

"WHAT EXACTLY MAKES YOU THINK I KNOW!?" The baby kept crying louder and louder. "STEVE!"

Pepper walked towards the nude, little creature and shushed softly at it.

"JARVIS, WHAT THE HELL?!"

"_I suggest you look at the videotape, sir." _

Tony felt a cold sweat drop run down his temple. JARVIS had never advised his master to _watch_ the tape instead of just telling what had just happened. The genius feared the worst although when he wasn't even sure what was the worst he could fear.

The TV screen turned on and the footage appeared. Pepper lifted the baby and tried to calm him down but it was a seemingly impossible task. Tony's stress levels were in the sky, he could feel the appalling tension in his shoulders as he stood rigidly, watching the recording.

"Shit…" Tony mouthed and looked down, trying, really trying his best to believe what he had just seen with his very eyes. He looked down and used one hand to press his temples toughly, digesting the huge pill of impossible odds in his brain.

"What. This is… No… He c- can't be…" The redhead's eyes widened as she stuttered with a very small amount of air left on her lungs after a horribly loud gasp.

Steve continued crying in Pepper's arms.

The genius stepped back and lent into a wall, his own weight was too much to take right now. He kept thinking, analyzing. Why, and more importantly: how the fuck.

And it suddenly hit him, on the face like a horrendous slap given with a robotic arm.

"Loki."

"What?!" Pepper looked back at him. She was paralyzed right where she was standing and just couldn't leave Steve on the bed or move at all. She had started to freak out greatly, but at a slow pace. By now her heart rate was higher than ever; her hands where sweaty against Steve's soft, bare skin and her face showed just how utterly panicked she was.

"Loki! That son of a bitch!"

The Avengers were at the SHIELD headquarters and he was taken there as a criminal a few weeks ago, in the hopes he could redeem himself after having his punishment in this weird dimension we all know little about, called Asgard.

His confusing words were brief, as he saw The Captain and The Man of Iron together. Somehow, Loki knew exactly what was going on there.

"Oh. You _are_ capable of loving, after all." The god said mockingly at Tony. "Or is it just lust?"

Steve's jawline tensed as he contained himself from punching Loki in his godly face.

"So you come to give us your word on love, Loki? _Oh, enlighten me."_ Tony replied determined, looking straight into his green eyes.

The God of Mischief chuckled lightly, for a split second. Then turned to Steve and with a quick movement he touched the blond's cheekbone; it was just a slight and harmless touch against Steve's skin before he took strong grip of Loki's hand and, twisting it almost too painfully, directed it away from himself.

It was certainly an interesting scene, one that you could not see just every day, or _any other day_. The rest of the Avengers were watching, including Maria Hill, Phil Coulson and Nick Fury, but just watching what the reactions of each man would be.

Loki didn't even flinch at the strain of his extremity. Instead he smiled once again, pleased with himself for some reason. Steve could feel Natasha's strong eyesight on him, but he kept making eye contact with the demi god, until Loki spoke up again, but it was to Tony this time.

"You take care of your Captain, Stark."

And that was it.

* * *

**A/N: This was fun!**

**Please leave your reviews :) **


	3. Chapter 3: Planet Caravan

******Disclaimer: All characters belong to Marvel.**

* * *

Tony tried to make himself clear to Pepper, even though he had talked three times faster than usual, even when he was explaining something that was against the seven nature laws.

"I…- I can't believe it! What exactly did Loki do to your boyfriend?!"

"He has some sort of magic powers- what do I know?! I just, I need to find him."

"Tony… I wish I could help you with this but I have the most relevant meeting of the company, so if you could just take Steve!"

Pepper put the sobbing baby in Tony's arms cautiously but swiftly, urging on her way out.

"I can't go get Loki with him!"

"Then don't! I'll be back soon, just try your best to _find_ Loki and keep the baby alive, okay?" Pepper ran down stairs and gathered all her stuff with prodigious assistant skills.

"Please- Pep!" Tony pleaded as he followed the redhead to the main door, feeling his heart pounding violently against the arc reactor.

"I can send you some supplies, though! You'll be fine!" She pronounced those last words already inside her car.

And then she was gone; Tony was left with words in his mouth, worries in his mind and a baby Steve in his arms.

The CEO allowed himself a second to breathe in and out in an attempt of calming down. He looked down at Steve, who was whining _oh-so-sweetly._

"Don't do this to me…" Tony walked back inside, holding Steve tight into his chest, bouncing him a little bit. Is this how it was done? "Okay, now you'll be good until aunty Pepper comes back, will you?"

The brunet placed his hands on Steve's chubby sides and lifted him with a bit of effort. The baby looked at Tony with huge, teary, blue eyes and Tony felt something inside his stomach tingle.

He wasn't crying anymore, and the genius was so glad that he could hear his own thoughts again.

"That's what you wanted?" Steve's reply was a soft cry. "I thought so. Now, I can wrap you in a blanket, and then you can sleep and let me solve this mess, 'kay?"

Tony went to the bedroom again, the sun was rising outside and the light sunshine came reflected inside. Sheets were tangled all around the bed and the two big, fluffy pillows Tony loved to sleep in were on the floor, pretty far away from each other; and Steve's flat and only pillow was still on his side.

The brunet placed the little being on the mattress and leaned in, his face close to the blond's. Steve smiled brightly.

"We only have sheets so that will have to be en- AAHH!" Tony groaned in pain when Steve pulled a lock of his brown hair unexpectedly, giggling harmoniously. "Stop! You're- AGH! I SWEAR!"

The billionaire grasped Steve's tiny arm and freed himself from the baby's tremendously robust grip with an abrupt movement. Then again, it was not a good idea.

"Oh please, no…" Tony muttered as he saw the exact moment when the light and brightness left Steve's eyes and he started crying noisily one more time, twirling from side to side in frustration (or pain? Maybe Tony had been too brusque with the baby).

"Fine, I'm sorry, but please don't start fussing again!" The genius' loud response made Steve feel worse, and he carried on with his disturbing cries. Steve didn't want an apology.

Tony sighed exhausted; it had only been a few minutes! He felt like crying himself. The CEO squeezed his eyes shut and tapped an index finger on his forehead.

The genius had wondered if he would be a good father before, and the answer was always a negative. He didn't know _anything _about comforting another human being for about 24 hours a day, every day. How could he know that? He had been raised rather terribly, the fact that he stopped crying when he felt like it when he was six because Howard had forbidden it could make anybody realize how unhealthy his childhood had been.

He stopped the motion of his body as tangled thoughts ran across his mind in the shapes of colors, smells and feelings from his infancy; the distant noise of a crying baby was also present. _Breathing deeply, in and out._

"Alright, c'mere…" Tony held his fussy little love carefully in the crook of his arm, slightly inclined, steadying him with the lower part of his arm and his hand. Steve soon curled up in a comforting fetal position; the baby calmed down a bit for a brief moment and soon he continued with his desperate cries.

Tony ran out of options and suddenly, surprisingly found himself singing with a soft and soothing voice a very few knew existed.

"_We sailed through endless skies. Stars shine like eyes. The black night sighs. The moon in silver trees. Falls down in tears_"

It was Planet Caravan. A slow, rhythmic song by Black Sabbath, one that you can fall asleep to, dreaming of new nonviolent places.

"_Light of the night. The earth, a purple blaze. Of sapphire haze in orbital ways."_

It worked: Tony gladly realized when Steve's whimpers ceased completely and started to drift off to sleep. The brunet looked down at the baby and smiled to himself before ending the lulling song.

"_While down below the trees. Bathed in cool breeze. Silver starlight breaks dawn from night. And so we pass on by. The crimson eye of great god Mars. As we travel the universe…"_

* * *

**A/N: Drink everytime the word "cry" appears in any form!**

**Hope you enjoyed it! Please leave your reviews if you did :)**


End file.
